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rainbows and butterflies
09.25.04 (5:12 am)   [edit]

life is not always rainbows and butterflies. sometimes, bad things happen. sometimes, we get hurt. after which, we go through a commensurate time of suffering. at that time, we think that life is unfair because in our mind's eye, we have been unduly wronged. so instead of letting that experience of suffering wash over us, we tend to attempt to avoid it. usually--at least in my experience--by putting on a facade of stoicism.  and it's usually because we're trying to nurse a bruised ego. it's a common reaction. it really is much easier to pretend to be perfectly fine than to admit that it still hurts.


i looked up the etymology of the word "suffering". and found that it means, "to undergo". i realized that it is simply a part of development. so why do we shy away from it? oftentimes, when faced with difficult situations, we turn, run and hide--not realizing that "to undergo" adversity is part of this thing we call life. running away from our problems is like rejecting life itself. 


it is our hedonistic tendencies that convince us that pain, or any kind of discomfort, is a bad thing. yet throughout history, has it ever been said that one learns anything of real depth or value from the experience of pleasure alone? no. the greatest lessons, in fact, have been learned from the most wrenching trials of the human spirit. it is by undergoing the difficulties that we learn and grow. 


sometimes, when things get especially bad, we lose sight of the fact that the good will come again. we forget that we’re supposed to suffer through the tough stuff; we forget that it is through suffering that we learn to appreciate the good.

 


posted by: Socrates (reply)
post date: 09.25.04 (8:20 am)

How singular is the thing called pleasure, and how curiously related to pain, which might be thought to be the opposite of it; for they are never present to a man at the same instant, and yet he who pursues either is generally compelled to take the other; their bodies are two, but they are joined by a single head. And I cannot help thinking that if Aesop had remembered them, he would have made a fable about God trying to reconcile their strife, and how, when he could not, he fastened their heads together; and this is the reason why when one comes the other follows, as I know by my own experience now, when after the pain in my leg which was caused by the chain pleasure appears to succeed.



posted by: altricial (reply)
post date: 09.25.04 (12:01 pm)

This is, of course, one of the toughest concepts to apply to parenting (for me anyway). To let your children suffer seems incongruous, yet the alternative is so much worse. Sometimes I just have to remind myself to treat my children like I would treat myself: Just let them suffer!



posted by: newbie (reply)
post date: 09.26.04 (5:39 pm)

"Yeah, I'm sad, but at the same time, I'm really happy that something could make me feel that sad. It's like...It makes me feel alive, you know. It makes me feel human. The only way I could feel this sad now is if I felt something really good before. So I have to take the bad with the good. So I guess what I'm feeling is like a beautiful sadness."
-Butters, South Park



posted by: forgetregret (reply)
post date: 09.26.04 (6:47 pm)

Yea pain sucks....but it is def. a part of life...and atleast you have 4 totally cool girls to help you deal with the pain part of it...and rejoice with you in the good times!



posted by: IPIFANI (reply)
post date: 10.02.04 (9:59 am)

Sweetmischief,

You are a life teacher. Your words of insight are an inspiration to all that read them.

"It's what you do when the coach isn't around what makes you a champion."



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